I’ve always been one of those people who can’t sit still. From the moment I was born I have been nonstop energy. But humans are not built to go at high speed 24 hours a day. Eventually, you have to rest.
For those of us who are lifelong athletes, type A overachievers, and forever do better folks — sitting still is a weakness. It means you’re wasting time that could be spent doing more and achieving more.
I have that ingrained in my brain. My anxiety flares when I am doing nothing. If I’m watching TV or sitting around lounging, my anxiety tells me I’m wasting time. It tells me I need to be doing something. Blogging, working out, cleaning, working — whatever it is — my anxiety tells me to DO SOMETHING.
But as I get to know myself, I also recognize that doing nothing allows my brain time to think. It gives me time alone to reflect on trauma, insecurities, and that’s another reason I just don’t like doing it.
Yet without alone time, I run on empty. I get overwhelmed, feel suffocated, and my immune system shuts down. That time to recharge is literally what I need to build back up my sparkle to get back at being my best.
Over the 2019 holiday season I spent two weeks traveling and 24/7 with people. I then went into a busy week at work followed by a week at a work conference (with pneumonia no less). When I got back my mom was kind enough to drive down and bring my dog back as well as spend time with me. It was all lot of weeks of fun, but also extremely draining.
So I spent the next two days doing …nothing. I watched TV, did face masks, worked out, did laundry — which sounds like a lot of things but for me that’s practically sitting motionless for two whole days.
I absolutely felt guilty about it too. I thought I should do more, run errands, catch up on work, truly DO SOMETHING productive. But I also forced myself to just be low key. I know that it’s what my body and mind needed to reset to a peaceful place.
Life is short, that’s definitely true. You really should maximize your time while you’re here. But me time, time to recharge, that’s important. It’s a huge part of being your best self, which is what life is about. You can’t do it all, but if you want to do the things you are doing with your full self - chill once in awhile and really appreciate the moment.