if you were to look up type A personality in the dictionary, you would see a flawless photo of ME. And at work, I am even worse.
I am constantly overachieving, I have issues letting go of projects, and I'm always volunteering for more. Because of that, I have no boundaries.
I get myself in these overworked, no work life balance situations and think NOT AGAIN WHY ME?! But if we are being honest - it's kind of my own fault.
Its so wonderful to be the go to rock star at work, and it feeds into the idea that you need to keep saying yes - but if you don't set boundaries you're going to find yourself saying no to YOU.
Boundaries are critical to maintaining your value in the workplace (honey don't allow yourself to do the most without getting your worth) and they're critical to preventing burnout.
I know Sequins - here comes the part where I make another effing list. We get it I'm type A and making neat little lists, that's really not going to help the problem. Step one, admitting the problem, step two, creating a list about the problem - er, right?
Boundaries. I don't have any and I need them. So what's a girl to do?
Recognize what boundaries are
I need to start realizing what's my role, and what is exceeding expectations and being a boss babe without overstepping into someone else' space. It's understanding I don't have to say yes to everything to be successful. I can simply own my own projects, make them amazing, and create that balance between work rock star and having time for personal life excellence too.
Understand the importance of boundaries to my life
I have made a very serious commitment to work life balance. I've spent the majority of 10 years working too much and putting my career first. When I say that I don't want that life anymore, that balance is what matters to me, I mean it. And anything that threatens my ability to have a happy healthy personal life, it's a deal breaker. That being said, I'm in an industry that demands a lot on my life. So I understand when I say I need boundaries, that could come with reprocussions. It could mean a company values work horse over my talent. I have to be willing to accept the consequences of setting the boundaries I have chosen to set.
Put the boundaries in place
Im at the point that I'm well aware of the times I need to stay in my lane. I know when I should walk away, shut up - and mind my own business. But type A Ashley she taps me on the shoulder and she's saying "Hey Babe but we could just quickly involve ourselves in this one, promise it will be no big deal" and then I'm stuck on a project that is sucking my soul out all day. I know my weakness, it's being able to act or rather don't act that's my problem. So this is where I start small. I leave work early. I don't answer emails after 5 (fine 6). I refuse to talk about work after work.
Stand firm
I've got boundaries now. I'm actively working to create a balance and separation and keep my unicorn in my own lane. But now I need to go big and vocalize the boundaries and push back when they're tested. I know I work hard. I know I deliver some damn good results. And I know that whenever I'm asking for boundaries, they're reasonable and professional. It's time to speak up, stick to my guns, and be prepared for whatever comes next
I will always be type A and I will always struggle with when go let go of the reigns at work. I realize that a lot of my complaints about my career are well within my control. If you're struggling with your work life, consider setting boundaries and communicating with your leadership what those boundaries mean to you. The best companies understand that the best employees have a balance and maintain reasonable boundaries when it comes to work. And if you're somewhere that you can't set boundaries, you may want to consider changing your situation.