I like being someone people can count on. At work and in my personal life, I'm always the person who says yes. Yes to more work. Yes to helping you move. Yes to all of it. It's never been about people pleasing. It's always been about caring about being someone people can turn to for whatever they may need. It's important my people know that I'mteam player and they're never alone. And I like to think I do a great job of being that person. But what I began to notice is that being the yes girl for everyone else meant saying no to me.
As I've gone on this whole journey to better myself, for myself - I've begun to practice the art of saying no. Without explanation. without apology. Without guilt. It's learning to say no, period.
Of course it goes without saying (but I'm gonna say it), I'm still here for my people. When they truly need me, I'm there. But it's also equally important that I'm there for me.
Back to me.
Saying no is about making time and having energy to do things for me. Whether I want to get my nails done, workout, or jut plain sit on my couch - it's acknowledging I need to do something that I want to do and I need to say no to someone else to do that. It's also about scheduling time to grow and challenge myself. This year that means working less and traveling more. So that's what I'm doing.
Saying no is about my mental and physical health. At work its saying no, I don't have the capacity to add that project to my plate and no I can't stay late tonight. It's saying no I won't travel simply because I don't have kids. It's making time each day to decompress and reset myself to a good place.
Saying no is about taking responsibility. Have you ever stopped to think about why you may be exhausted or feeling overwhelmed? Because the more I think about all the things I do, the more I realize that there's a lot I could be saying no to. You are in control of your time. And you're in control of how you choose to spend it.
Saying no, without explanation, is part of growing up. It's recognizing your time is just as important as everyone else' and its recognizing what you need to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Think of all that you do for other people and then think about what you do for yourself. Think about how much you value everyone else. And give yourself that same value and respect.
Say no. Get rid of the guilt, and allow yourself time to do what you need to do to have your best life. Time is limited. Energy is limited. Life is limited. Don't limit the possibilities.