Ah yes - the generation of the swipe. In 2018, true love is found behind our cell phones, in our sweat pants, judging people based on looks and witty profile opening lines. What a time to be alive.
While I'm thankful dating in our generation is not what it was in the 1950's or really even the 1990's - I often long for the traditions of love's past.
It's Valentine's Day, a time Hallmark has designated to spend our money on diamonds, chocolates, fancy dinners and awkwardly flimsy lingerie. I'll be honest, I like V-Day. I don't really care if you want to call it single's awareness day, propose to your significant other, or choose to boycott it's corporate significance. I'm into the shiny things and I like to celebrate love.
I'm 32, a lot of my friends are married, in serious relationships, or worried about finding the one. And it's got me reflecting on dating in 2018 and how much it kind of sucks.
I'm not blaming men, I'm not blaming women - I'm not generally a fan of blaming anyone unless we can accompany that with some solutions. But generationally, because we rely so much on technology, we have become to rely on that same technology for human relationships.
The thing is - technology does not account for human feelings, interactions, or flaws. You can fill out a profile, swipe right - do all the things technology swears by in order to provide you your soulmate but at the end of the day, it can still fail.
There's no science to love. No magic formula. And in a world where we put so much effort into the technology of dating, I think we are missing out on organic love. Because we can so easily find the next best mate, our choice to give up on what's in front of us becomes the go to move.
Relationships are not easy. There is no perfect partner. I'm not saying put up with abuse, in fact, never put up with any form of abuse, ever. But there's something to be said for understanding that love ain't easy. You will not always be happy in your relationship. You will not always like your partner. But you should understand the compromise that needs to happen, the effort that maintaining a lifetime takes, and be committed to your mate because despite those real life problems, that's your chosen lover.
Every day, you have to choose each other. The love I admire the most in life are the people who go through all the things life throws at them and every day they wake up and they say I choose you because we are a team and I don't want to swipe right on someone else just because we've had a few bumps in the road.
In 2018 dating is hard. I don't really know anyone who meets anyone organically anymore. I think it takes more work to find a mate in 2018. An actual commitment to finding someone you can stand for a long period of time. Whether I like it or not, I'm probably going to have to succumb and stick with this online dating business to find some viable options.
Dating in 2018 is weird. Its the guy who asks you when you'll have sex with a new partner within the first 20 minutes of the first date. It's the guy who doesn't believe women should work. It's the guy who takes you on a bar crawl and does shots for your initial meeting. But it's also reconnecting with acquaintances you look at differently. It's men who take you on a hunt to find the best mac n cheese in Texas. It's the guy you meet at a friend's party who nervously asks if you'd like to go to dinner.
We can blame dating today on technology, and we aren't wrong. But does that mean love isn't out there? It doesn't. It means dating is a little different, a little more work - but it's still worth it if for your life means finding a teammate to do all the bumps in the road with. So love in 2018, it's kind of a nightmare, but so am I sometimes, and at the end of the day, I'm also one hell of a catch.