Panicked

It is obviously a very strange and stressful time in our world right now. Everywhere we turn there is more scary news about the Coronavirus. And that’s causing a panic.

We should absolutely be taking this very seriously. It is a very serious virus and has proven to shut down entire nations. But there is absolutely no reason to panic.

I obviously life with anxiety. And I’m scared too because I have a compromised immune system.

I am also a realist. And I care about myself and others. So I am choosing not to panic. I am also choosing to self quarantine. You should be doing these things as well.

If you have anxiety, this is a challenge. So let’s talk about to make it easier.

Limit Exposure

I mean this literally by social distancing but I also mean in the form of a digital detox. Stay informed with reputable and real sources (aka stop listening to the White House), but limit the amount of negative information you are exposing yourself to. Log off social media where a lot of the information available is wrong. Turn the channel if you’ve already spent time updating yourself for the day. The more you take in the content that is negative, the more you will panic. Turn it off, turn off the thing that is exacerbating your anxiety.

Stay Occupied

Distractions are everything. Been meaning to clean out your closet and donate old clothes? Is that book your friend recommended gathering dust on your bedside table? Still have that Pilates class waiting in your DVR? Do those things. Choose positive distractions during this time. Do all the things we all put off in our regular busy lives. And if it doesn’t bring you joy, don’t do it.

Create a Safe Space

You’re going to be spending a lot of time at home. Put in the work to make it a safe and comfortable space for you. Prepare with the supplies you need (prepare, NOT panic), make a cozy space, clean and organize. Do everything you need to do in order to feel joy and calm in your space. The more you feel “at home” the easier it is to actually spend well, all of your time there.

Invest in the right kind of social

No, not social media. We are social beings, we need that connection. FaceTime your family and friends. Text with them. Send cards, emails, tag the memes! Continue to remain connected in a healthy low risk way to the people that are important to you. Even the most introverted person in the world is not going to survive with no human contact.

Keep moving

My fitness game the last week has been on point. Get outside. Go for a walk (if you’re in a suburban or rural area, city kids sorry - keep your workouts at home), sit outside, get a workout class in (virtually). Mental health is connected to physical health. Don’t sit too long. Don’t sleep all day. Get moving.

Eat healthy

Again, health body, healthy mind. You can still order groceries online. Cool healthy meals. Eat healthy snacks. You’ve got time to show your Pinterest board the recipes you’ve been saving are actually going to be out to use. Sure, indulge, but eat as healthy as you can.

I know, things seem bleak right now. Things are hard. They’re straight up not fun. And for a lot of people, they are terrifying. Show up for yourself and others by doing the right thing. Stay home. Be kind. Help others where you can. We will get through this, but we have to do it together.

Complimentary

Compliments make me feel awkward. Like hives awkward. I don’t know how to respond, what to say, what to do with my hands - none of it.

If I’m getting into my college sociology about it, I think most women don’t know how to manage compliments. Unlike men, we are taught to be humble and put ourselves second. So we shrug off the niceties and give the credit to others, even when that credit is ours to take.

If I’m getting psychological about it, I think it’s my life as an athlete and the culture of being the best but owing it to the team and coaches. It’s ingrained in us to work really hard but share the credit with the people who motivate us each day.

I’m sure it also has to do with my deep rooted need to criticize myself because I won’t accept anything less than perfection.

Whatever the reason, I cannot take a compliment.

Watching me take a compliment is like watching a baby giraffe take its first steps. It’s all wild flailing and massive falls.

I want to be better about taking compliments and accepting credit where it is due because I work really hard and I’m a really good person.

I think building my confidence and learning to accept my flaws is rooted in being able to simply say thank you when someone says something kind about me.

I’m working on challenging myself to do so. To say thank you and move on.

And that shit is hard. Really hard.

Every time I receive a compliment, I can say thank you, but then I immediately want to word vomit something that makes me more humble or point out a negative trait about myself. It’s a physical need where this tiny little anxiety monster yells at me like “YOU”RE NOT THAT GREAT SAY IT.” And so I do.

Literally the only place I’ve been successful thus far is in therapy, and that’s because my therapist will stop me and not allow me to qualify myself.

The more and more I practice though, the easier it is getting to tell my anxiety monster to back off.

It’s part of our culture to practice humility. And that’s important. But it is also important to acknowledge the really great things about who you are. Life reminds us often of our imperfections, allowing the things that make us great to be said out loud is important to maintaining a good personal value.

Get complimentary, and get that way with yourself.