Panicked

It is obviously a very strange and stressful time in our world right now. Everywhere we turn there is more scary news about the Coronavirus. And that’s causing a panic.

We should absolutely be taking this very seriously. It is a very serious virus and has proven to shut down entire nations. But there is absolutely no reason to panic.

I obviously life with anxiety. And I’m scared too because I have a compromised immune system.

I am also a realist. And I care about myself and others. So I am choosing not to panic. I am also choosing to self quarantine. You should be doing these things as well.

If you have anxiety, this is a challenge. So let’s talk about to make it easier.

Limit Exposure

I mean this literally by social distancing but I also mean in the form of a digital detox. Stay informed with reputable and real sources (aka stop listening to the White House), but limit the amount of negative information you are exposing yourself to. Log off social media where a lot of the information available is wrong. Turn the channel if you’ve already spent time updating yourself for the day. The more you take in the content that is negative, the more you will panic. Turn it off, turn off the thing that is exacerbating your anxiety.

Stay Occupied

Distractions are everything. Been meaning to clean out your closet and donate old clothes? Is that book your friend recommended gathering dust on your bedside table? Still have that Pilates class waiting in your DVR? Do those things. Choose positive distractions during this time. Do all the things we all put off in our regular busy lives. And if it doesn’t bring you joy, don’t do it.

Create a Safe Space

You’re going to be spending a lot of time at home. Put in the work to make it a safe and comfortable space for you. Prepare with the supplies you need (prepare, NOT panic), make a cozy space, clean and organize. Do everything you need to do in order to feel joy and calm in your space. The more you feel “at home” the easier it is to actually spend well, all of your time there.

Invest in the right kind of social

No, not social media. We are social beings, we need that connection. FaceTime your family and friends. Text with them. Send cards, emails, tag the memes! Continue to remain connected in a healthy low risk way to the people that are important to you. Even the most introverted person in the world is not going to survive with no human contact.

Keep moving

My fitness game the last week has been on point. Get outside. Go for a walk (if you’re in a suburban or rural area, city kids sorry - keep your workouts at home), sit outside, get a workout class in (virtually). Mental health is connected to physical health. Don’t sit too long. Don’t sleep all day. Get moving.

Eat healthy

Again, health body, healthy mind. You can still order groceries online. Cool healthy meals. Eat healthy snacks. You’ve got time to show your Pinterest board the recipes you’ve been saving are actually going to be out to use. Sure, indulge, but eat as healthy as you can.

I know, things seem bleak right now. Things are hard. They’re straight up not fun. And for a lot of people, they are terrifying. Show up for yourself and others by doing the right thing. Stay home. Be kind. Help others where you can. We will get through this, but we have to do it together.

Take a breath.

Alright, I’m noticing these blogs are taking on a theme lately. I’m obviously thinking a lot about opinions, judgments, and respecting differences.

Humans are by nature judgmental. From looks to jobs to homes to opinions, we judge it all. The state of politics and social issues has only intensified the need to judge.

Because of that, I’ve made a conscious effort lately to take a breath. To take a breath and have compassion. To take a breath and remain neutral. To take a breath and move on.

Being judgmental is really exhausting. It’s a sickness that can aggravate anxiety and is really easy to avoid if you make a real effort to do so. You’ve got to understand that judgment on its own doesn’t do anything. It doesn’t change how another person acts. It doesn’t make you feel any better about anything.

Judgment is a poison.

If you’re going to judge another, have a plan of action afterwards. Either figure out why you’re judging and realize it has nothing to do with you and move on - or figure out how that judgment can be turned into positive action.

If you are judging the way someone looks, stop. That’s the type of judgment that is none of your business and says a lot more about you than anyone else.

If you are judging someone for being a racist, choose to educate and then choose to disassociate yourself with this person.

Judgment is a poison.

It will poison your heart, mind, and soul if you let it.

Most of the judgments we make each day are unnecessary. Most can be removed from your world entirely.

Actively choose to refuse to take part in this toxic culture. Take a breath. Make a decision based in positive outcomes moving forward.

The only way we can figure out how to absolve some of the hate we have is by choosing love. Educate with love. Speak with love. Lead from a place of love, if only for your own self care.

Live Loud, Silently.

Unless you post about it on the socials, people assume you're not living life. How weird is that? Like if you don't post about your relationship, your job, your weekend fun, it didn't happen. Call me crazy but the less I'm on social media, the more I'm living my fullest life.

And yet - if I'm social stalking someone and they haven't posted in awhile - haven't put up an IG photo with BAE - I assume they broke up. Which makes no sense.

Say it with me: Just because you choose not to post about it, doesn't mean it's not real.

Life is meant to be lived really loud. It's meant to travel, adventure, spend time with others, eat, drink, run - its meant for all of the activities. You go out and get the dream job. Go on the bucket list trip. Marry the love of your life. And at the same time, the bad things happen too. We get fired. We experience breakups. We lose loved ones. It's all part of the circle of existing in the world. Or as Lion King so eloquently taught us - the circle of life. Disney really did teach us everything we ever need to survive and thrive.

Social media doesn't have to be involved in every step of your journey. Some things are meant to be kept to yourself, there's an energy and joy in holding some things close to your soul. I personally love keeping secrets. I think its exciting to be the only one (or among a select few) to know something happening in the world. As someone who used to share everything about my life on the socials, I've learned the peace that comes with experiencing milestones without social involvement.

Ok lady but you write a blog in which you share some very personal things. you're absolutely correct. But I get to craft the content you're receiving. I don't share anything I don't want to share. And a lot of the gritty details of my experiences, I hold them back because they're my business, not yours. My social media, and my blog - they are authentic to who I am - but they are also only a small snippet of who I am. As always - social media is and always will be, a highlight reel.

I love photos - and I'm constantly on my phone snapping pictures. Sure, sometimes for the socials - but most often, to have the memories. I like to print the photos I take and send them to friends and family and I like to frame them for my home and office. I associate pictures with vivid feelings. And so I like to keep them near. They remind me of how lucky I am, how much I've grown, how many experiences I've been lucky enough to have.

And I'm also a big proponent of setting the phone down. Of experiencing things without posting them. Sure - share things that make you feel joy, and scrolling the feeds can often bring smiles and memories and engage you with people who greatly affect your life. Social media is a powerfully positive tool. But it's also powerfully negative. Log off. Set the phone down. Walk away. Experience whatever moment you are in for what it is. There's something freeing about being completely unavailable and silent on the socials.

Creating a healthy relationship with social media starts with being able to shut it down. To have perspective. And to be able to utilize it as an enhancement, not a life force.

We've become so obsessed with how we appear on social media we forget to actually live life.

Seriously - do you know the people who go on vacations and then save photos to use at a later date? It appears they're always traveling or on an adventure when realistically, they went on one trip for a week a year ago and just keep posting photos. Or how about the people who take 100 selfies and just post them at different times? And the posed food photos others take and store to make sure they have content available at all times. That's a lot of time and energy just to mold a perfectly crafted news feed.

I got so frustrated with one of my best friends on vacation because she always wanted posed photos of herself on our trip. What about photos of us? Or of the scenery? I get it - everyone deserves to do life how they choose - but I want to experience it all. And not worry about how I look doing it. I want time with the people and places that matter. (To be fair - not everyone does things the same way and we are more like sisters at this point so we are supposed to annoy each other lol).

I have friends who only post on certain days/times or certain amounts to maximize likes. Not because they're famous or sponsored or doing it for work, because they simply want likes. What do likes provide you? If your self worth is defined by how many likes you get - you've got a problem.

Am I going to completely get off social media? I'm not. I absolutely get caught up in it at times. There are even times in which I feel unhappy as a direct result of social media. And when that happens, I want to be able to recognize it and walk away. Even for a brief amount of time.

You don't owe anyone any part of your life that you don't want to share. In fact, life will become a lot more enjoyable and a lot more peaceful by not sharing more than you share. Share some things, save others. Log on and then spend time logged off. Make social media enjoyable, not a chore and not a burden. Live your life in the world super loud but live in online silently. You won't regret not posting, but you may regret posting.